Delirious Revisited.

My mother called from work saying they had ice cream cups and would I like her to bring me home some. I’m guessing I was probably around six years old.

“Sure,” I replied eagerly.

“How many do you want?” she asked.

“Ummm…five?”

Five seemed like a good number. Not a greedy number, and certainly enough to tide me over.

“All right, then. I’ll get five.”

The next morning I came downstairs to five cups. Empty cups. For ice cream. My mother worked in a paper cup factory. They usually made drink cups but they were trying a run of ice cream cups as a new product. She occasionally brought me home stacks of failed cups to play with. I built things and made stylish Barbie furniture from them.

What a goddamn disappointed kid I was.

Dowried Dogs and Cats?

Bought somee "Show" magazines from 1963 and 1964 while in Seattle.

I like this. Odd.

No Bopping Allowed.

Bought some "Show" magazines from 1963 and 1964 while in Seattle.

One of my favorite scans from a photo spread:

Four Rums, Two Victims

So amidst working out a spiced rum concoction for a birthday celebration tomorrow, we went to Trader Joe's to get more mixers. About to check out, we spotted the Flipflop rum display with both spiced and silver rums at $3.99/750ml. Always looking for that TJ's bargain, we opted to grab a bottle of both.We had Bacardi Silver at home and Kirkland (that would be Costco, and the Internet claims it's probably distilled by Cruzan) spiced rum. We also had Zaya aged rum, but that is for another time. For less than $8, we were willing to do a taste comparison.

Well, I could go on about the nuances and finishes and limitations of the Flipflop rum except for one thing: it's really bad. Bacardi Silver is pure heaven in comparison. The spiced performed better, but it's flavored, just like the Costco rum. That may have helped it along. If you're in dire straits and need a rum to mix ridiculously large batches of punch with, it could work (what do you think you're getting in those $4 happy hour strawberry daiquiris, anyway?). It could be good for your emergency stock towards the end of the night when your house party causes the fire marshall a quarter-mile away to start twitching. I wouldn't try to pass it off without a lot of mixers or another liquor included.

So, what to do with it? I dunno. I guess I won't be getting invited to parties for a while.

Post left in my draft queue.

Sitting at a dark bar in Seattle, I’m fiddling with my phone because Chris has gone to the restroom. Out of the corner of my eye, I spy movement in front of me. There are two large glasses that are either amber colored or contain amber liquid that is lacking carbonation, which have just been placed on the bar. I glance behind me expecting to see someone picking up the glasses, which I might presume are filled with cider. There is no one behind me. I look at the bartender.

“This is for me?” I stare abashedly.

“Yes,” he replies.

“What is this?” I ask.

“Water.” He stares abashedly.

I’ve just come to the realization that I’ve not been freely handed a glass of water at a bar in…forever. Nope, they don’t give you water in San Francisco unless you ask (Chris thinks it’s a holdout from the drought years). But then again, I don’t think the bars in Atlanta did, either. Or in DC.

Next night, the same thing happens as soon as we hit the stools at another place. I thank the guy as if he’s just given us the first one on the house. I’m not sure why this simple act fascinates me, it just does.

    

Story, as promised.

I promised a story about this.

My cat is dying. Velvet was diagnosed with an extremely rare autoimmune disease called Feline Progressive Histiocytosis. She is growing cysts on her paws and on her face. She is in no pain, though the vet says she may be licking at the cysts because they itch. Or she may be licking at them because her paw is suddenly one-third larger and 3 times uglier. She’s on Predisone for the itching and I don’t want to keep her on it because it’s not good for her, especially at age 17, so I’ve got an assortment of recovery collars that I’ve been trying on her to see which is the most comfortable, since she’ll be wearing them for the rest of her life. That, too, is a mystery. I have no idea how long she’ll live. It’s basically a “quality of life” question, which is especially hard to answer if the animal is not in pain.

I was sitting around with these collars around me, picking them up, contemplating them and laying them back down. The red one in the picture is an old one. I had just bought the clear one for her because she was much heavier when I bought the red one, some ten years ago, and now it seemed too big. Trying to get an idea of just how aggravating these things probably are, I stuck it around my neck. That’s when I got the idea for the photo. I went through my vintage clothing that I collected as a teen. I pulled out the vintage jewelry I had, as well. I put my hair back and pushed it up again. I wore very little makeup. I wanted a portrait, and I wanted some sort of realism. Or hyperrealism. I had my husband take a bunch of shots and I picked what I thought looked best. Velvet looked amazingly good, given that black cats don’t photograph well unless you’re using a camera that is not part of another type of electronic gadget. You can’t see any of the cysts. The one on her face is on her chin and it blends into the shadows. I was happy to have a great photo of my cat and an absurd one of myself.

    

Portrait of Cat and Crazy Woman.

Yes, there is a story.

   

My Keep Portland Weird Story from yesterday

Chris and I are walking down a residential street and we come across what looks like an elephant sculpture sitting at the curb. I take a picture, walk around the side, see it has wheels, and become even more curious. I step back and think, maybe it's for a parade or for camping. I walk around to the back where there is a small door and a window, where I then exclaim, "I am really curious about what this is!"

"IT'S MY HOUSE!" a voice bellows from within.

"It's a very cute house," I reply, stepping, but nearly falling backwards.

We scurry away.

      

Prozac™ and the Cat: A Bitter Battle

Cats, like humans, can suffer from anxiety or depression, but often these feelings manifest themselves in behaviors such as compulsive licking, aggression or litterbox neglect. If you find that your feline has exhibited such behaviors and physical causes such as parasites and allergies have been ruled out, it may be time to consider psychological causes. The ASPCA's Pet Behavior Database reveals that compulsive licking and other behaviors can be a result of changes in the cat's life: addition or subtraction of another pet or family member, moving, and home remodeling, to name a few. Pamela Perry, DVM, of the Cornell University Feline Health Center, notes that if your cat is seriously stressed, a form of temporary anti-anxiety drug therapy prescribed by your veterinarian may be in order. Veterinarians have taken to prescribing human-grade Fluoxetine (Prozac™) to felines as an off-label use to treating these symptoms. While this makes for an easily-obtainable and inexpensive treatment, due to its availability in generic form, there is one significant drawback to the pill, and that is its bitter flavor.


Hiding the flavor is extremely difficult. Compounding the medicine into a chicken- or tuna-flavored liquid to mix into food may not be enough to fool most cats. Hiding the pill inside a treat or pill putty can be effective if the treat is small enough and the cat swallows it whole. If the cat bites the treat, rest assured, it will most likely spit it out. Transdermal preparations are possible, but they are also expensive and research is inconclusive regarding absorption into the body. Furthermore, applying a transdermal preparation to the ear, even if ears are alternated from day to day, can still potentially cause irritation to the skin. The only practical solution may be to pill a cat or give him or her the compounded liquid directly. This article is not to instruct the techniques for pilling or dosing a cat; there are plenty of instructions available through doing searches. Rather, this is a discussion of a few additional hints to make easier, whatever method you may choose.

First, do not administer the pill or preparation during meal times. Kitty may start to lose trust in you if you are repeatedly fouling dinnertime with “poison.” Wait until the cat is settled into another activity, in perhaps an hour or more, before your attempt. Fluoxetine is known to cause poor appetite; making mealtimes unappealing and uncomfortable will only exacerbate the issue.

Second, do not administer the medicine in kitchen or wherever your cat’s bowls are placed. Again, the idea is to separate this activity from normal feeding sessions such that the cat will not associate something traumatic with an essential daily activity.

Third, do not dispense the medicine via any food or treat that he or she is already taking. If the cat refuses the tainted food or treat, it may not return to eating it when the food is not dosed. The distaste may remain a cat’s memory for some time. This is especially important if the cat is already being administered other medications via these routes or if the cat is on a special diet where switching food types may not be possible.

Treating your kitty's illness may be a challenge, and you may feel helpless when your pet is unwilling to cooperate in daily dosing. There are many options for administering your cat’s medication, and it may take much trial and error before finding out what works for the both of you. That said, the aforementioned suggestions can help smooth out the process, keep it from getting more complicated, and prevent resentment on the part of your cat.

Sweating Out the Heat in the Kitchen: Strategies for Summer Cooking

When the sun appears higher in the sky and the air around you becomes a veritable steam bake, it’s time to start thinking about cooler solutions for the kitchen. If cranking the air conditioning into overdrive or ordering carry-out leaves a bad taste in your mouth and wallet, and the usual cold soups and salads get start to get old, it’s time to explore some ideas for efficient cooking while surviving the summer heat.

Consider taking it outside, and that doesn’t just mean grilling or building a summer kitchen! Slow cookers can be set in a covered area outside while you’re working or sleeping. One of the most efficient appliances for cooking, a slow cooker simmers at a low temperature while the heat is contained under a glass lid. The lid provides the ability to view progress without disturbing the cooking process and releasing the contained heat. Slow cooking is a particularly effective method for roasting leaner, less-expensive cuts of meats that would otherwise lose moisture and be rendered tough by other methods of cooking. It is even possible to bake quick breads, muffins and the like in a slow cooker; there are special inserts for some cookers, but simply using a few balls of aluminum foil to raise the pan from the surface of the cooker interior will allow the heat to circulate more evenly.

With the small plates craze that has been popular in many restaurants, why not create your own quick tapas/meze meal at home? Set out plates of store-bought hummus, cheeses, olives, some good bread or crackers, and even summer sausage. Round it off with a classic green salad. Greek yogurt with honey and fruit for dessert make it perfect—as does a bottle of good wine.

If you’re willing to experiment with making some of the above tapas, instead of using store-bought products, try the following ideas. Marinate olives overnight in the refrigerator in oil, garlic and vinegar (red wine, balsamic, flavored or whatever suits your tastes). Take canned chickpeas, tahini, olive oil and lemon recipe for hummus and adapt it by substituting black beans for the chickpeas and lime for the lemon. If you’re feeling ambitious and want to try something new, substitute toasted pepitas (pumpkin seeds) for the tahini.

Poaching a batch of salmon or flattened chicken breasts will come in handy later in the week for sandwiches, wraps or salads: cover in a skillet with water, seasoning and white wine, if you wish, and cook until it reaches a gentle simmer. Remove from the heat, keeping the pan tightly covered, and allow the meat to continue to cook in the broth for 20 minutes.

Another quick-cooking idea includes the egg, an economical staple often forgotten after breakfast. An omelet is good any time of the day, but substitute Asian-style vegetables for the filling, top with packaged gravy and frozen or premade rice and you’ve got egg foo yung in a pinch.

Beans are another often-overlooked fundamental food. Combine a can of white beans with tuna, olives, tomato, cucumber and dressing for a filling for a delicious wrap or the topping to a crisp salad. Requiring a little more prep work, homemade black bean veggie burgers can be whipped up in minutes by draining a can of black beans and combining it in a blender with oats for filler, along with spices and eggs for a binder. Shape into patties and lightly fry for a few minutes on each side.

One final solution worth mentioning is induction cooking. While an initially expensive investment—starting at around $125 or so, along with the potential cost of additional cookware—an induction cooker emits little heat energy from the unit itself. It operates by producing an electromagnetic field that generates heat within the cookware and transfers that heat to the food. This is far more efficient than conventional methods of cooking where generated heat is transferred from the unit to the cookware and then to the food, allowing for a loss of energy on the way. However, because the field is electromagnetic, only ferrous metals (cast iron, magnetic stainless) can be used on the cooker; you’ll need to consider the cost of purchasing additional cookware, if needed.

When summer heat leaves you wanting to get out of the kitchen, seek out some creative solutions to cooking. By incorporating one or more of these strategies, recipe suggestions or technologies, your kitchen will be cooler and your appetite sated.